Coaching is not therapy. My role as a coach is not to listen to what my coachee has to say and then feel sorry for him or her. A coach that helps you transform your life for the better doesn’t do that for you. A coach will help you discover how to solve your problems with your own eyes, your own feelings, your own actions. I have learned that in coaching, advice is useless. It is up to a coachee to give his or her coach permission to share his or her resources with her. It is not the coach’s job to intrude with her vision but rather to focus on the coachee’s agenda and lead her to her full potential.
Coaching is about facilitating positive changes in the other person. My coaching style is to help my coachee move forward, not to be there for her as a crutch. I’m a love coach. The good in everything comes down to love; when we say God, good, love, happiness, freedom, those are all the same words. Through the answers to my questions and what the coachee says or doesn’t say – and through the coachee granting me the permission to do so – I will show her that happiness is within her and she can bring it out.
But to bring that happiness out, there is some work to be done by the coachee. She must let go of her past; she has to release her past so that nothing bothers her. My intention is to bring my coachee to a place where she becomes hootless, where nothing and no one ever bothers her.
The coachee will find herself in a state of unconscious competence, so to speak. She’ll enjoy a sense of satisfaction at all times because, through coaching, she will find that despite outside obstacles, happiness is always present within. Much like the sun is always there but is sometimes obscured by clouds.
With my help, the coachee will see the light behind the clouds and realize that she always has had that radiance within her. With her permission, I can show her where to find it. It’s a wonderful place, where nothing can bother you. The sky may be falling all around you, but you will still feel confident and happy. From Eastern philosophical teachings I have learned that there is really no such thing as good or bad, and so will you.
It’s not my decision if a coachee should go there. All I do is ask questions and from your answers you will discover who you really are. I’ve never encountered a student of mine, or a coachee, who didn’t get benefit from the experience. They always get something out of our sessions because I have found my sun and it shines through to them.